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| SHEEP FALLS |
Howdy, howdy! I guess I tend to do most of my thinking and writing at night when the house is quiet and I am done with work. This is an entry from my journal a few weeks before the transplant.
It's been a while since I have jotted down my thoughts and feelings. Today is Sunday, "Miracle Boy" and "Rock" are at the cabin and they are waiting for the rest of the "In-Law" family to show up at the cabin. I have not gone up with them, because again, I am trying to save all my vacation time for the "BIG DAY". I keep thinking how I can serve the lord and what his purpose is for me. Today's sermon was on talking to an non-believer. My brothers grew up the exact same family and the exact same teaching, but have not allowed God or Christ fully into their loves. I took our Pastors lesson as a sign that getting the gospel to them was one of those important things God wanted me to do.
If you listen to many Christian songs, there are a lot of songs that have the lyrics that have to do with "HEART" I sang at church and out of the blue the thought of the surgeon cutting into my chest and how that might feel struck me! Ouch! That is going to hurt like a bugger!! Ugh! Luckily that passed pretty quickly. Then, my second thought was, I wonder how quickly I am going to be able to give "Miracle Boy" a hug. He is the best snuggle bug and I wanted to make sure I could quickly after the surgery give him hugs.
That night, I had dinner with my family since my boys were away. . My two brother, my two sister in-laws and my mom. They kept on asking me if I was ok, and bombarding me with a lot of questions. Finally, I told them what was going on. I felt bad because I knew now they were going to start to worry and over think everything, especially, my mom. My Brother G, started to cry and it's exactly what I didn't want to happen. THe LAST thing I wanted to do was to make them worry. At church today we were talking about not letting the moment get away from trying to bring people to Christ. So, I tried to make them understand, it's ok, I'm ok, it's all part of Gods plan. I don't know if they completely understood what I was saying while I was telling them That I have given ALL control to God as they all should.
On my way home, I sent them some bible verses hoping it would help. I don't expect them to suddenly Welcome God and Christ into their lives, just to soften their hearts. These are the verses I shared with them. I love them regardless, but I want them to feel the HAPPINESS of knowing that he is in control. It is the most relieving feeling!
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34
"Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.” John 14:27
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7
I really want them to lean on God and let him in! Is that so hard! Is that too much to ask for? Ugh!
The first time ever, my sister in law who I love to pieces, sent me a text telling me she is praying for me. That is enough to make it all worthwhile!! I hope this is a step towards praying and maybe just maybe slowly letting God will work in her heart to soften.
Seems like that is long enough for today, I will continue with the In-Law reunion tomorrow.
Love you to pieces! I will finish with this song tonight, and a picture of God's creation.
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